Trapped

Now I'm on my hands and knees begging for a way out, wondering why I was put into existence here in this world that I've come to hate so much. How can one find life so beautiful? Once your in, your stuck. One might think its as easy as finding your way out, but that just faults you with hurting others who care about you. How could you possibly do that with those constant guilty thoughts running through your mind? You don't understand how guilty I already feel by just wanting to die. I see life as something I need to get over with, which I cant even bear anymore. I see no future, nor do I even want to as I hate the past and present. How could things possibly ever change? I'm sick of feeling this way; it hurts so bad, but there's nothing I can do. These painful feelings will never go away; and I'm never going to be okay.

irremediable

It takes a lot for me to love; So much time, trust, and so much more courage. Every time I've given my heart away Ive gotten it back in pieces. You can only glue something back together so many times before your realize its just one of those things that won't stay together, something irremediable. The only time you'll be okay is when you forget what it's like to love and you can only imagine how long it would take to forget an emotion so tenacious and powerful. Love always seems so divine; It never ends as well, but always does end, leaving that agitating empty space within. I wish I could have the power to forget, but memory is what brings you to your future so remember to learn from your past and appreciate the fact that you now know.